On being introverted, sensitive and living with anxiety.

Some of us would choose a solo walk in nature, curling up with a good book or dining with a close friend over a party any day.

And if you’d choose the party? Please read on as a way to understand us more…

Not everyone can do ‘group events’ with ease.
If you’re introverted, highly sensitive, anxious or even just discerning, I know, you get it!

We tend to get overwhelmed in crowds, restaurants, festivals, parties, shopping centres (shudder), workshops and well, anywhere that’s not home. That’s why you’ll rarely see me at the party. Very occasionally I might go to an event. And only if it’s a real ‘yes’ and I’m feeling robust and well prepared! (This includes having an exit strategy.) People who don’t get it might think we’re anti-social (or worse). But we’re not. I’m not. (There’s a science behind this which I will expand on tomorrow). We actually tend to have incredibly deep, intimate, meaningful friendships.

I’m not interested in overstuffing my life, overstimulating my nervous system. I can’t. Won’t. I gave up trying to “fit in” a long time ago, because it was an destructive cycle of self-deception, shame and mental illness. It was exhausting.

I like my spacious and quiet life, and I value my solo and creative time, my closest loved ones, nature, resting. I regulate and recharge here. Not in the busy, noisy world.

So if I don’t engage you, come to your parties, or I say no – it’s not personal. It’s me taking care of myself.

I’d love to hear your experiences with sensitivity and how you came to realise/embrace it? Where are you now with it?Or if you are not how do you experience us sensitives?

See PART TWO – The Science of Sensitivity:
Implications for the Nervous System, Psoas and our health.explains the science of sensitivity (and safety and anxiety…)

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Image: Candice Bohannon